here's my schedule for these few days-
today:
1) pergi vacuum rumah
2)pergi masak nasi
3)pergi gosok baju untuk terawih malam ni
4)pergi tidur..jgn luper set alarm
5)pergi amik fatin dari skolah.
6)pergi sediakan makanan untuk buka.
7)pergi kemas meja lepas makan.
tonight:
8)get ready for terawih
9)balik terawih..
10)jangan luper tengok ghost whisperer.
11)tidur balik.
tomorrow:
12)bangun untuk sahur
13)jangan luper minum coke sebelum masok tidor.
14)kalau sakit perut tanggung sendiri
15)bangun and get ready
16)pergi cck for donnoe wat
17)cari kawan go for study kat library
18)buat suker hati sendiri

so yesterday was mama nyer bdae.
bought this chicken that was prepared to be cooked
i burnt it.
the rempah went black
donnoe why
the fire was normal
i cut of the skin
my kangkong sambal was nice
it was the only thing that was finished to the very last bit
ouh well.
i think im done for today
daah!

so..
stayed back today for science self-study.
so..
we(me,zetty,siti,fiqah) were talking.
then tibe part circumcise(sunat lerr).
we were talking about johan.
izzati called him ciner sunat.
so izzati and fiqah argued.
and then i was like.
sunat tu actually aper arh?
aku tauu they potong potong.
but potong wat?
then three of them were like laughing.
then afiqah citer kan.
but her voice was loud.
AND..
ATUK'S GROUP HEARD US.
and they turned to look at us.
wat lar.
malu seh.
my face went hot like pepper.
atuk..
lain kali kann.
jangan pasang telinge tauu.
tak baik.
tsk3.
hmm.
dah lah.
daah.
LOVE LOVE
farhanah

alaaaaaaarrrrrrrr!!!
hady menang!!!
tak fair!!
dah lah malas nak update.
ni sumer angkara idah larh ni.
vote 9 kali.
semangat keBABIan larh ko.
ank k**l**g atas tebing.
wahahahahahahaha.
ok.
sorry idah.
aku sayaaaaang idah!!!
daah!

i saw jonathan on sat =D)).
went cwp with siti,her sis,idah and her cousin nia.
isha(siti's sis) is like soooo cute.
we went out to eat lar actually.
so i hold isha's hand everytime.
siti told us to find places to sit at any fast food restaurant.
so,i brought isha and idah while siti withdrew cash.
isha kept asking where siti was.
i said siti hilang and im kidnapping isha.
isha said.
kakak tak baik.
nanti isha cubit telinga kakak sampai darah baru tau eh.
isha is sooo cute!!!!!
then we finally found places at bk.
siti asked isha which kakak baik.
isha said nia.
the bad kakak?
ME!!!!
idah is the kakak who lies alot.
wahahaha.
kiter sayang isha.
then we took neo2!!
there was one pic isha decorated.
isha wrote her full name and bordered it with a heart.
habis muke aku kau kerjekan isha.
hahh.
i want to exchange sisters.
hehh.
so..
slamat berpuasa semue!!!
love love.
daah.

ouh.
i received two pairs of LEVIS jeans from abah.
yay!!

im dying.
im dying for buka to come asap.
im dying to drink my iced lemon tea.
im dying for a full body massage esp. on my butt(haha).
im dying to get out of the house tmr.
im dying for the time when all exams are finally finished asap.
im dying for the time when my art is finally finished.
im dying for an mp3 i asked abah to help pay for.
its like im dying.
sooner or later i might be dead.
for im too exhausted dying.
ouh.
i think atuk(as in my real atuk;not firdaus atuk.haha) is batman.
as in batman dah pancit.
coz i remembered on the last trip we all went to the zoo.
atuk got bitten by a bat on his finger.
literally bitten.
now.
he works at night.
as a security guard.
but i secretly know he is wearing his costume with that cloak.
except theres no more six packs.
wahahahahhahah.
hes maintaning security in the place where he works at.
but i think he is jaga-ing Singapore.
Singapore better thank my batman arh.
now his cucu(me!) want to follow suit.
but i rather be Shadowcat(X-men).
ok i am lame.
got my class photo.
my smile is soo fake.
ok.
daah.

-sweet cheeses.warm love.caffeine addicted.

fuck.
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
i hate this thing.
i hate all this because one bloody guy started this so called uproar.
like seriously?
fuck off larh.
i dont get it.
why is it that because of syamsi.
me and izzati arent talking.
i feel that izzati is like more of siding him than siding me.
like okay.
she herself said she rather lose syamsi as a friend than lose me.
so why now?
the reason im not talking to her is because i bloodily feel that she hates me to the bloody core.
and i feel lost in this kind of thing.
syamsi is soo bloody childish.
it gets to my bloody nerves.
i remember these days.
you are the bloody reason our friendship is hanging.
like seriously,fuck off.
i value friendship so much that i feel its controlling me.
i dont know who i am.
or who my friends are.
to siti,idah and fiqah,
thank you soooo much for sticking through with me.
ouh.
i feel that the malay guys are ganging up on me.
i dont bloody know what they want.
and i dont bloody care.
i resolve to not talk about anything to anyone.
i resolve to be more stronger and not weak.
i resolve to not trust anyone evr so easily.
i think i'll take off the password.
some people are following suit.
p.s the answer to my password is kurt-ish.
im feeling insecure.
why does this happen near exam times?
like bloody fuck off lar.



and ouh.
i think ive blogged enough.
i think maybe this blog will be put on hold.
till im okay to blog.
i need to prepare for my exams.

Farhanah nak minta maaf kalau Farhanah ader membuat salah dan silap.
Puji-pujian hanya bagi Allah.
Yang tidak baik tu,Farhanah punye silap.
Farhanah ingin minta maaf kalau Farhanah tidak layan awak semasa kite berkawan.
Farhanah menyesal dan Farhanah harap ia akan tidak berlaku lagi.
Sekarang ini,Farhanah rase Farhanah akan menyepikan diri.
Farhanah harap tidak ade orang yang dengki dengan Farhanah.
Harap awak dapat halalkan makan minum Farhanah.
Kalau salah silap minta2 Farhanah dimaafkan.
Farhanah juga nak minta maaf jika ada kata2 kesat yang telah Farhanah gunakan semasa kite berbual.
Farhanah minta diri dulu.
--

erm.
lets see.
ive improved in geography.
24.5/30.
erm.
one of these puaser days i'll cook.
im planning on an italian meets mexican theme.
pasta with pizza?
garlic bread.
then also never forgetting abah who dont like these type of things.
maybe ill cook for abah chicken stew.
how about that?
the drinks will be tea and coke.
yupp.
asalkan aku tak meletupkan dapur sudah lah.
ouh yar.
this morning.
i was about to dispose off my dirty clothes into the kitchen balcony.
then i hear this like funny and strange noise.
i on the lights.
door still closed.
i saw a bat hanging on the laundry basket.
i was like oh god!
i went to wake mama up.
mama came to take a look.
i described the bat as normal big.
mama said it was small like shit.
so mama covered it up with a rag.
i was like mama jaga2.
nanti die gigit mama karang mama jadi batwoman.
so then mama threw the bat outside the window.
i told abah wat i said.
and abah laughed and said batwoman pantat kau larh.
i seriously realise that im bloody lame.
i think lame is cute and funny.
im fasting today.
zul malukan me seh.
me and the girls were talking about our hair growing on the hands.
so i made comparison between mine and zul.
and zul said out loud that we were comparing our bulu with his.
like diam2 lah sikit.
tsk3.
oklarh.
daah lah.

sweet cheeses.
warm love.

i fixed a password on this blog.
due to erm.
somethings.
i dont know.
nowadays its a confusion.
especially the term friends.
i realised that those i left are my true ones.
and those i joined are there and not there.
something like that.
i hate cikgu mus.
for calling me giler.
and for isolating me during mt lessons.
grrr!!
bingit lerrrr.
and im sorry for not layaning you today.
but i dont know what i was supposed to do.
i cant lie to myself and say i....
ouh god.
this is hard.
i love my family.
more than some people.
but im better off on my own.
god.
im moody.
daah all.

recap.
abang made mama cry yesterday while she was eating.
and i stood by her.
i just kept quiet.
tell me im adopted,really.
i feel like running away from home.
i'll run to atuk's house.
school is nearby.
ouh shit.
i'll update later.
abah's home.
bye!

i want my day to be back as normal.
but.
you see.
i have got alot of problems.
but i trust no one.
i feel that everyone is on my shadow.
i need comfort.
i need a confidant.
i need someone to talk to.
but i am left with no choice.
suicide is not an option.
i guess.
i guess i'll just sleep until.
death comes knocking on my door.
on a brighter note.
wait.
there is just no brighter note.
i apologise for the rain.
i sang till it rained.
and.
and ouh god.
im sick.
daah.

i love choir.
haha.
i love altos.
altos rock tauuuu.
ok.
so today went causeway after school.
erm..
siti lost her hp.
tercicir kot?
then its like she was strong.
she never cry.
hehh.
strong arh siti.
so saw adi tadi.
i was mad at idah for telling him where we were.
i hate adi larh.
hehh.
oklarh.
dada.
love.
fana sayang kurt.
tapi..
kurt dah mati.
fana nak nangis arh.
kiter sayaaaaang kurt.
haaartsss.
ouh.siti,idah and me took neoprints.
yay!!
oklarh.
dada.
love love.
ouh p.s
jon tk kluar,
yay yay!!
aku akan menari dengan.....
oh fuck malay.
i will dance in happiness.
seriously?
malay is like hard.
malay is sooo not for me.
especially cikgu mus.
who called me giler.
for laughing alone.
like hey.
i laughed at afiqahs joke.
but cikgu didnt see afiqah laughing.
like crap larh.
then she said entah2 bisikan setan dekat2 dgn tingkap tuu.
and i said to liyana that eleh.bisikan setan konon.cikgu larh yg kene bisik ngan setan tu psl tk tutup aurat.
hehh.
aderlarh tuu.
ok larh.
this is seriously dada for now.
love love.
<3

okay.
erm..
i shouldnt boast.
but good news should be shared kan?
my name came out in newspaper.
hehh.
ok.
i know.
setakat.
fine.
erm.
today had choir.
okay luh.
only that my legs were painful.
like why cant we sit and sing?
ok.
so we did scales.
and i sang loudly.
thats good.
its like.
do.
do-re-do.
do-re-mi-re-do.
do-re-mi-fa-mi-re-do.
do-re-mi-fa-so-fa-mi-re-do.
do-re-mi-fa-so-la-so-fa-mi-re-do.
do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-la-so-fa-mi-re-do.
do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-do-ti-la-so-fa-mi-re-do.
and vice-versa.
hehh.
so erm.
music lesson next week will be my turn to show and tell.
i thought of showing a video.
but dont know what song to show.
sum 41-we're all to blame?
i dont know.
help anyone?
ouh.
choir.
erm..ms mos said that if our performance is good.
well go on an exchange program to kl.
that is like sooo fun.
i told mama.
mama said cakap jer besar padehal padehal.
hehh.
then tadi i got scolded by mama for being rude to abang.
idah heard me getting scolded becoz she was on the line.
and.....
SHE BLOODY LAUGHED AT ME!!
nnt kau.
sok kau kene.
DIE!!!!!
hehh.
nite nite evryone.
love love.
fana. :)

alright alright.
ill update okay?
sheesh.
you guys arh.
its only like 4 days since ive updated and you are like making me feel as if it has been a year.
relax yar?
ok.
so holidays are finally over.
school starts tmr.
hmwrk are being done at the last minute.
tsk3.
ok.
lets see.
erm.
on fri i went for maths supp.
then went to kfc for brunch.
sat went to mendaki.
after that went library to do grp work.
izzati tagged along as i asked her to.
we studied after grp work.
this is the fun part.
after studying,went to pasar malam.
bought takoyaki.
raser2 jerr.
we went to sit down near the carpark.
i ate one.
it was like hot.
so i ate slowly.
izzati ate one.
i told her to finish the last one.
then,being the not-penyabar,she ate the whole thing in one bite.
she thought it was like normal temperature alredi.
it was actually still hot.
then she was like.
omg!omg!
and i laughed at her.
the takoyaki in my stomach was going to come out thru my mouth.
but i laughed at izzati.wahaha.
then she was like hot hot.
her mouth all comot.
i brought her to the toilet.
and she washed her mouth.
i was like.
izzati belo sakk.
belo gilerrr.
ok.
talking about belo.
my friends ramai belo.
and it always happen whenever i am around.
like lets say.
that time i went causeway with noridah.
we went popular first.
i told her to pay my items coz she got $50.
then the cashier put evrything in the plastic bg.
idah gave the popular card.
the cashier gave the popular card back at idah.
idah got ready to go.
we were just about to go off when the cashier said $14.25.
idah was like huh?
then she looked down at her hand.
she forgot to pay the cashier.
belo seh.
thats not all.
at civic pulak.
i was finding for earring as fatins bdae was abt to come.
the price was 3 for $5.
so i took one dangling earring,one stud and one ring.
but i had a hard time to choose the ring.
so idah got fed up and took the container of items and went to this aunty.
she was like aunty how much arh?
the aunty looked back at her then walk off.
she got the wrong aunty.
then idah got ever so paiseh and was scolding me.
whahahha.
she said she doesnt want to go out wif me nemore coz she always paiseh when with me.
ahha.
then today at madrasah.
nuraini was looking at r nyer hp coz she want see pics.
then she went to gallery but couldnt find the pics.
so,she gace up.
i turned the phone upside down and told her.
camner nk tgk gmbr kalau hp tkder camera.
then she got paiseh while i laughed at her.
ahhahaha.
my friends are so cute seh.
especially when they get paiseh.
ok then.
ouh.
excuse me for my poor english.
mls uhh nk phrase.
ok this is a long entry.
so.
might not update for a long time.
daah.

i woke up early today.
ard 8+.
so.
bathed.
then on comp.
listened to nirvana.
rape me's the best.
to me larh.
so later will be going out.
not too sure.
i have the money.
abg will give me $2 if i basuh and jemur baju.
ok.
daah.

the world's crying as we bade goodbye to steve irwin.
and i miss him.
his "g'day".
his "ain't she beautiful?".
his crazy but cute movements in that wooden house.
you know swinging from the ropes all.
i miss him.
and when i was listening to the radio.
carey was reading this sms.
by this donnoe who.
who is like a bitch seh.
he/she said good wat he die.
he was inviting trouble for himself.
it was only sooner or later.
like wat uhh.
ok then.
im off.
i did a good deed today.
i downloaded songs for ezzati.
things i do for friends.
tsk3.
wahhahaha.
ok then.
daah all.
R.I.P Steve Irwin.
i love you larh.

i hate that bloody class.
non-stop bloody madness.
the lamest of all.
the nonsense of all.
mainly from.
a shorty bitch.
im sorry.
no hard feelings eh?
but seriously.
during assembly.
they all go around shouting like some bitchy makciks.
like come on.
youre girls.
behave like one.
and then.
theres like this other girl in that class.
she with another girl in another class.
bloody only.
like they said i act mentang2 hair rebond.
like bloody shit.
im friendly.
ok.maybe not so.
i mean i dont go hey,hi,hello to people i dont know.
at least i dont like shout baik _____.
when _____ goes up to claim a prize.
and you both.
im gonna punch your teeth.
till they stay in.
making you feel bloody greatful to me.
like i dont charge fees for you.
you buck tooth bitch.
god seriously?
i get cranky.
i get mad.
i get violent.
when i get angry with someone,
i punch,
and when i punch,
people die.
like seriously?
ever had one from me?
im bloody irritated.
and i dont like it when i get bloody irritated.
im like a mine field.
get me irritated like totally,
i blow up.
i blow you up till your body bloody explodes.
eeeeee!!!!!
im gonna go running again.
ill go running whenever i get mad.
so there was one yesterday.
today.
maybe tomorrow too.
yarh.
i just seem to realise.
when i get angry.
i will say the word bloody non-stop.
like seriously.
ok.
im dedicating this post to the class there and there.
onece again.
no bloody offence yar?
except to some who i really meant it for.
hehe.
oklarh.
daah all.


to those bloody bitches,
i hate you so

so today.
went shopping at orchard with mama.
and fatin.
lets see.
erm..
i met a drop dead gorgeous guy at john little.
a mat salleh.
tall.
black hair.
i looked closely at him.
he was just a mannequin.
wahahha.
farhanah belo giler bapak nyerr.
oklarh.
so then went home by abah's lorry.
i was sitting alone behind.
let me tell you about abah's lorry.
its green.
and..
it has a sofa behind it!!
ok.
so after like walking for hours.
i had leg cramps.
so i lied on the sofa.
you know.
legs up and your body on one side.
then your hand support your head.
that type of posture arh.
so i was like lying like that on the sofa while reading a book.
then in the middle of the expressway.
there was like this private hospital ambulance.
the non-995 one.
yar.
the driver honk at me.
i looked at him.
he was doing this thumbs up sign.
i just smiled.
i continued reading.
then he honked again.
i looked up and he waved before speeding off.
tell me that was not flirty.
wahaha.
the driver was around 20+ maybe?
malay.
wahaha.
ok i think that sums it off for today.
so daah.


and when i see your pictures,
i kinda melt.
totally

god.
i want my bdae to come up fast.
though i dont expect presents.
im such a bad friend.
i like aint got money to buy any.
like i promise you all.
maybe at the end of the year or something.
ill have a party to commemorate your birthdays.
ill buy the food.
then we bbq or something.
amacam?
ok tk?
so.
i cant wait for the 21st of october to come up fast.
daah all.

like say..
today turned out not so good.
i had a fight with mama.
i mean she was like the on who started it.
since i showed her my report book she was forever nagging at me.
she sindir-ed me.
she was like belikan ni belikan tu tapi result mcm taik.
then she said something and i was like.
nnt kejaplarh.
then she was like kau kurang ajar eh.
then i dont know wat.
i burst into tears and i remembered saying
me:mama lebih sayang kan abang dari mama sayangkan ana.
mama:saper cakap.
me:ana yang cakap.
then she kept quiet.
i banged my way thorugh doing housework.
i dont know why i have this kind of energy that keeps going when im angry.
i wiped the windows.
i cleaned my fan.
i did some homework.
i washed the clothes.
i washed my apron.
why cant i have this energy when im doing 2.4?
like wat arh.
boring arh sitting at home.
ouh i need to pull up my grades.
my science i got A1.
good kan?
its like my only A1.
so..im gonna buck up.
yer promise.
so thats it.


when is it gonna be back as per normal.
wait..
i dont know normal.
do you?

Siti Nur Farhanah.
Seven-teen.
211092
I don't smile at strangers,especially female.
I burrow my soul in books for they are my place for escape.
Talk to me and maybe I'll listen,or maybe I'll zone out if you're boring me.



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