Thursday, October 08, 2009 ♥
yesterday went to the library to help a close friend pen a love letter to his girl.
and i must say those words i penned, were so sweet that if you were to give it to me,i'd cry.
as such,im calling out for those clueless who'd wanna pen down love letters for their current loved ones,to come forward for i charge measly sum of money for sweet moments to bring to your girl/boy.
since i was at the library,i borrowed this memoir by Judith Moore.
her story intrigued me right from the first chapter's first sentence.
she began with "You're too fat to fuck".
and my heart went crashing as i read on.
its about how she consistently goes on a diet and walks every morning,yet,her weight keeps yo-yo-ing up and down.
and sometimes,i feel her.
like really,i feel her sadness and her disappointment,her disgust.
and sometimes,we have the same thought too.
i'll type down those words i really share with her.
I fantasize rapid weight loss: "Now if I lose one pound per day for thirty days, I can fit into my pale blue dress with the middy collar or button up my blouse that's printed with tiny goldfish."
I like to imagine that i am having liposuction. A masked doctor vacuums fat from my belly and thighs and unspeakably huge butt. A glass vat next to the operating table fills with tubs o' lard, and the doctor, voice muffled by his mask, tells his nurses that he's siphoned forty pounds out of me.
As the line grew shorter, as child after child was measured and weighed, he or she went to stand at the back of the room. "Don't fidget," the teacher might say, or, "No talking. Shh."
I wanted to bolt. I couldn't. I bowed my head, I gazed at my boy's FFFF-width brown oxfords. I kept count as one after another child got weighed. I hoped the A-bomb would fall or a fire would start before the nurses got to me.
this book is sad,hurtful and true.
i hope it doesn't happen to me.
♥
